The earth was once the home to all Cetaceans
But they'd been thinned out there by quite a lot
Now they have got their own spot in Creation
It's Cachelot

The sounds of waves upon the shore don't linger
`Cause there's no place for there a beach to be
And if they could, the whales would give us all the finger
From Cachelot
  "So, what—they're just going to flipper us off?"
  "…tell me you didn't say that…"
  "…sorry…"

Cachelot! Cachelot! There beats a steady song
Cachelot! Cachelot! Where bifurcated is just wrong

The dolphins play among the waves so freely
The baleens mostly graze and eat a lot
Unless they're busy crushing us completely
On Cachelot

Completely do the Catadons ignore us
Save Orcas, sent as spies by Lumpjaw's lot
Were we to disappear, none there would mourn us
On Cachelot

Cachelot! Cachelot! Town after town has been absorbed
Cachelot! Cachelot! Still us the Catadons ignore...

Beneath the waves coelenterates are evolving
For our demise the ConsucC doth hatch a plot
But be that as it may, we still will win the day&mdash
We'll knock synapses out of kilter
By neurophoning like a filker
`Neath the waves of Cachelot!